Joke's On You, Pal
by sami282
Summary: This was written for the First Friday Night OC Challenge on the fox message boards. On New Year's Eve House finds out that his good friend Wilson has set him up with a date for the hospital's New Year's Eve party. What will House do? Read to find out!


Joke's On You, Pal

"Ok the plan's ready to go," Eliza said into the phone.

"Good," Wilson replied back on the other end of the phone. He was tired of how cruel House had become in the aftermath of the whole Tritter situation and had decided he was going to help his friend start the New Year off right.

"The taxi and I are just about to pick your friend up," Eliza said as they pulled up to the apartment complex.

"Alright, take good care of him. And don't mind his snark." Wilson said before hanging. Turning to Cuddy and company beside him he said, "The plans good to go."

The gang all smiled in hopes that Wilson's plan worked because if it didn't it would be hell to pay for them all.

Meanwhile House was inside dressed up as much as he decided to get considering the party tonight wasn't too formal. A not so wrinkled button down shirt and a brown jacket made his normal jeans, t-shirt and tennis shoes look a little more presentable.

After seeing the taxi waiting outside through his window he gathered his cane and headed out hoping the evening wouldn't be the bore he was anticipating. He didn't notice the slim redhead till he slid into the seat. His first thought was that she was smoking hot. Her emerald dress played on her hair and made her lighter green eyes pop. The first thing he said however was, "Who the hell are you?"

"I'm Eliza, your date for the evening," The woman said in a warm voice not at all put off by the glare on his face.

"Uh, I don't remember asking anyone out," House replied.

"I know you didn't, someone else did on your behalf," Eliza answered as she glanced over at the man. He was a little rough around the edges, but his striking blue eyes were enough to distract a woman from his cane and rough exterior.

House immediately knew this was Wilson's doing. First he'd stolen his guitar now this. What the hell had gotten into his friend? Not that it really mattered because he was dead meat as soon as House walked into the party. Wait scratch that he wasn't going to this party now. If he wanted a date he could find one himself. He found himself reaching for the door, ready to go back inside when it hit him that's what Wilson would expect. If he really wanted to make Wilson pay he'd have to go just to make him miserable or come up with away to turn this joke or what ever it was back on him.

With that House pulled his hand back in the door and settled in for the cab ride. His company tried to make small talk here and there but she was met with his back and silence as he stared out the window.

"So what's this party like?" Eliza asked with a smile as the taxi pulled into the hospital parking lot.

"My guess is boring as hell, but I wouldn't know since I usually don't go. My former friend hounded me in to going and now I know why," House answered without looking at her.

"Well we could always not go," Eliza suggested.

"Tempting though I say we act like we didn't hit it off and turn this stupid joke around on him,"

"Hmm, what's in it for me?" Was her reply. Though in her opinion it wouldn't be much of an act they really hadn't hit it off at all. Mainly because he hadn't been very receptive to her.

"A ride on my other cane once it's all over," House suggested after giving it a moment of thought.

She surprised him when she leaned over grabbed him through his jeans and whispered, "I don't think your cane here would be able to handle me," in his ear.

"Want to make a friendly wager on it," House asked once she pulled a way.

She complied with a sexy smile and then sat back in her seat just as the taxi came to a stop in front of the hospital entrance.

Once the taxi arrived they both stepped out but before heading inside House pushed her against the wall of the hospital and kissed her, "A little incentive to go along with the new plan," he said before pulling away.

With that they headed inside.

Wilson smiled as he watched them walk into the party together, figuring just maybe it had worked. Immediately that same smile turned upside down as he watched House limp off to the bar with a glare and Eliza head towards him with a glare of her own.

"You failed to mention he was the king of crude sexual innuendos, Jimmy," Eliza said once she'd approached her old friend.

"Sorry it's the only way he can tell a woman she's hot," Wilson replied. "Stay here I'll go get you a drink,"

Eliza smiled as he walked away. Jimmy had very interesting choices in friends herself included.

"First you steal my guitar, now you've appointed yourself in charge of my love life," House commented as Wilson came up to the bar and ordered two drinks.

"House it's almost the New Year I just wanted you to enjoy yourself for a little bit," Wilson replied.

"Well that's where you went wrong, thinking." House quipped as he took another swallow of his scotch.

Wilson nodded, "House if you don't like her that's ok, but cut out the innuendos alright. She's had enough for a life time."

"So you know her, what'd you do cheat on a woman with her?" House snarked.

Wilson rolled his eyes and let out an exasperated sigh, "No House we never like that. Besides she's a good friend of mines little sister."

The party continued on and for most of it House and the red-headed Eliza avoided each other. Therefore it was quite a shock when House came over and kissed her at midnight.

Happy New Year," House said with a smirk at Wilson before limping off.

A confused Wilson looked back and forth between them before shaking his head. The joke was definitely on him.


End file.
